Some Personal Thoughts

As parents of two girls, my husband and I want to guard their purity, self image, and identity.
We have often had thoughts such as, “If we let them wear things that show a tummy, skirts that are too short, or mini-teenager style clothes now, what will they want to wear when they are older?” In my mind, an 8 year old should not look like a little mini teenager.

When Jody asked me to team up with her to do this blog, I knew it would be a valuable tool to help us as we guide our daughters into womanhood. Even though our girls are young, the Christian Charm Course aligns with our philosophy of how we want to raise our girls.
Of course, at their age, not all of the big issues have come up yet. But we don’t want to be caught unprepared in the future, so we have set guidelines on the clothes they wear and we’ve discussed our reasons, especially with our oldest.

Our girls possess a lot of energy and are very busy. A gentle and quiet spirit is something that is a daily challenge for us, but it’s important for them to know there is a time to be silly, twirl, and have fun just as there is also a time to display self-control.

Both of our girls have extremely curly hair. This is very opposite of my own hair, so I’ve had to learn and ask a lot of questions in order to take proper care of their hair. I was determined to learn how to comb and condition their hair properly so they would have healthy curls. I remember reading somewhere that it is important for curly girls to embrace their curls. One way I do this is by never saying anything negative about their hair. When people comment about how beautiful their hair is and what great curls they have, it would be easy to reply in an exasperated voice, “Yes, but you don’t know how hard it is to fix it…” I want my girls to embrace their curls as a gift from God. I know we will go through challenging times, and already have at times when they would prefer straight hair. But ultimately, in the end, we want them to be comfortable in how God created them and rejoice in the beauty that God gave them.

Last Spring I was combing my oldest daughter’s hair. She was pretty proud of the ringlets that were forming. She made the comment, “If (enter a boy’s name here) could see my hair I think he would like me just like (enter a girl friend’s name here).” I am so thankful that I was able to slow down and take the opportunity to discuss this with her. We had the “friends like you the way you are” conversation.

Not everything is about their outward appearance, though. Sometimes we can get so caught up in the compliments about their outward beauty. As parents, moms as well as dads, we can help them focus on the importance of inner beauty. Take the time to compliment your daughter on how well she is sharing, or how responsible her actions were.

Karen
Sweet Brown Sugars